Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Saviour. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; (Habakkuk 3:17-19a)
I was reminded of this text recently by a friend who was clinging to God’s faithfulness in the midst of a really tough situation. And I had to think, what a classic example Habakkuk gives here of the importance of a right perspective. Not allowing the circumstances, as challenging as they were, dictate his outlook. Not denying the harsh reality immediately before him, nor allowing it to discredit the ultimate reality that he knew to be true – that God is good and faithful. And he allows this perspective to determine his actions – he chooses to rejoice.
We explored this theme of Perspectives for ACMN’s twelfth annual training webinar in early August this year. It was an online event due to ongoing Covid restrictions, and we had participants join us from all around Australia, and even a few international guests! Our seven presenters were all members of the ACMN Committee, and they brought us a smorgasbord of ideas and insights.
We considered things that threaten to limit our perspective, like cognitive bias and sub-conscious filters. We were shown ways to broaden our lens to view an alternative or future reality, and how that can make for much better decision making in the present. We looked at developing a biblical perspective. We moved through conceptual theories to practical tools and skills to assist us in helping mentorees develop a more adequate perspective. In the final section we explored the importance of the mentor’s self-awareness of their own perspectives and what they bring (sometimes subconsciously) into the mentoring relationship.
While there was plenty of quality content (the webinar notes and recordings are available for members in our Mentoring Resources), I’ve reflected here on a few of the highlights I took away from the webinar:
Do these terms sound familiar: “analysis-paralysis” or “tunnel vision”? Ever been accused of “making a mountain out of a mole hill”, or “missing the forest for the trees”?
I’ve been there before – faced with a big decision and agonising over the ‘what ifs’, and focussing primarily on the question ‘what will happen for me if I do this?’ This is where I found the Action-Consequence Matrix[1] really helpful, which is based on the principle that ‘when we take action, there are consequences; and when we don’t take action, there are consequences. Either way, things happen.’ We can get stuck trying to pre-empt every outcome if I take a particular action, but that’s not the only issue at stake here. What will happen if I don’t do it? What won’t happen? How will it impact me, negatively and positively? And what about the impact on others? Will it still have an impact this time next year? In ten years? Taking the time to think through the issue and let each scenario play out through the different angles of the matrix helps us to clarify what is really at stake and ultimately make better decisions.
How often do you or your mentoree resist change or get stuck feeling trapped in a situation? We won’t necessarily be able to change the situation but we can adjust how we view it – this is called Reframing. One example of this is called ‘reversing the agenda’. Like a bit of good old reverse psychology – tell a child not to do it and they will ;). Instead of thinking that there’s no possible way that something can work, take the opposite stance and try to articulate it as the only viable option. Take the viewpoint of another person in the situation, or describe an alternative reality, reversing both positives and negatives. This process can help to bring clarity and a fresh perspective to the situation.
We already know the power of a good question in mentoring – so how can we make good use of Questions to shift or broaden perspective? Using questions can help examine what is informing our current perspective, and identify potential blinders. Is it possible that my life narrative is being driven by an old recording on replay? Challenging a limiting belief behind our assumptions can sometimes open up a variety of options that we had never considered. Just because I’ve done this before doesn’t mean I need to repeat it. What was true last time I was confronted by a similar scenario may not be the case this time around. Does this perspective even belong to me or have I ‘inherited’ it? Do I want to make it my own? Open ended questions can help unearth brand new opportunities. What would I do if my energy and finances were unlimited? So many great questions!
The few hours that we spent together exploring this important topic only just scratched the surface, and it has since sparked more discussions, also at our regular Member Zoom Networking Meetings. As mentors we can play an important role in helping mentorees move from a narrow perspective to finding new ways to see, and as such we hope you will continue to engage with the topic and continue to develop a healthy perspective!
Carmen Wagenaar
(Administrator – ACMN)
[1] http://changingminds.org/explanations/decision/what_happen.htm