Have you ever had a mentoree struggling with just not being as ‘sure’ in their Christian convictions as they once were? The label ‘deconstruction’ gets thrown about with alarm by some and is used to describe developments further along this continuum that could lead to people taking a break, or even leaving faith communities.
One the things we can do as mentors in this space is to normalise doubt. In popular opinion, doubt might be the opposite to faith. Not so in the life of many who persevere in the Christian life. For some doubt isn’t just a fleeting experience, but a longer term companion spurring deeper searching.
Of course the go-to biblical story when contemplating doubt is Thomas’ encounter with the risen Jesus in John 20. In John 20:24-25, Thomas makes that famous wager – “unless I see and touch with my own hands, I won’t believe…”
Eight days later, Jesus appears and provides the certainty he craved. Carravagio imagined the scene like this:
Look at the way Jesus’ strong hand is wrapped around Thomas’ wrist, guiding his index finger deep into the open wound.
Look at Thomas’ expression – eyes wide – seeing and feeling the truth. The crucified Jesus is alive. And the other 2 disciples behind Thomas – you can almost hear them saying, “see Thomas, see Thomas, we told you!!” But I don’t think Thomas can hear them in this moment.
Thomas sometimes gets a bad rap in popular culture – Doubting Thomas.
Maybe we should think of him as honest Thomas. Pragmatic, honest Thomas. Thomas who bravely asks the awkward question no one else is brave enough to voice.
In John 14, Jesus comforts his disciples – telling them he would be going away, but his going was in order to prepare a place for them. A place where they would join him. Jesus said, “You know the way to the place where I am going.”
Vs 5 Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” Jesus seems to have assumed the disciples knew who he was. Thomas owns the fact that he’s clueless. Because of the honesty of Thomas, Jesus spelled things out.
Vs 6 Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Those words have been ringing out since Jesus uttered them. Thanks for asking the question Thomas!
A while ago, I discovered Malcolm Guite, a Poet-Priest who is Chaplain of Girton College, Cambridge. His poem on Thomas resonates with me:
St. Thomas the Apostle
“We do not know… how can we know the way?”
Courageous master of the awkward question,
You spoke the words the others dared not say
And cut through their evasion and abstraction.
Oh doubting Thomas, father of my faith,
You put your finger on the nub of things
We cannot love some disembodied wraith,
But flesh and blood must be our king of kings.
Your teaching is to touch, embrace, anoint,
Feel after Him and find Him in the flesh.
Because He loved your awkward counter-point
The Word has heard and granted you your wish.
Oh place my hands with yours, help me divine
The wounded God whose wounds are healing mine.
So we can thank God for the doubters amongst us – even for the times we join their ranks. It is in asking the brave questions we grow in our understanding of God and of our own limitations.
Come Lord Jesus! We look forward to the time when our faith will be made sight and all our doubts are dispelled.
Kylie Brown